Tuesday, 3 April 2018

Are Women Invisible Over 40?



Hi Loves
I had no intention of writing a post on this topic, but the last few days have saddened me seeing so many women on social media say they have become or are becoming invisible once they reach 40. As you know I hit that particular milestone 21 years ago, and for what it's worth I don't ever recall feeling invisible, I do however recall around that time gaining a slight semblance of wisdom, when I say wisdom I mean knowing the outcome of a bad decision and doing it anyway, when you are younger you can blame inexperience on mistakes, at 40 plus it's just a dumb choice and you should have known better!

My experience of 40+ were that a lot of women around that time experience empty nest, or partners having a mid life crisis, we all know they do that! ( silly old sods) Once your kids have flown the nest, or indeed the silly old sod has flown the nest it becomes time for reflection.  The majority of us spend our entire lives putting people, jobs and animals at the top of the list when it comes to our attention.   If you suddenly find yourself at this crossroads you have to take time to reflect who you really are, not someones, Mum, Boss, Partner, Carer. You are now just YOU. Discovering what you like for yourself is a huge task. It can be very daunting, equally it can be a lot of fun when you rediscover/re-invent yourself and blossom, I promise the invisible feeling will soon disappear when you start making yourself the centre of your world. With it comes confidence, a spring in your step and a sudden feeling of self worth, and quite frankly you won't give a toss who is paying you attention.

I fear that I am digressing from the crux of this topic ( nothing unusual there)  The ladies that are bringing this topic to the forefront are predominantly ladies in the media, press/bloggers etc, I could be wrong but the feeling I get is that they feel they are being overlooked when it comes to opportunities within blogging. My take on this is that brands and PR are becoming truly switched on ( slowly ) I will admit, but are beginning to see where the spending power is, we have all heard the stupid grey pound BS, most of us colour, thank you!  But the belief is that we have more income now, I personally don't think it's about income. I think we are more selective where our money goes and don't feel the need to buy every single thing that hits the market, so are more likely to spend the big bucks on the things we want.  It had never occurred to me that a brand is ageist, but I have learnt that some are, I am contacted on a daily basis by brands and agencies, and I have to say that some are right on the button when it comes to knowing who spends the money!  Of course I am overlooked by some trendy brands that believe us oldies sit indoors with one powder compact and a worn down lippie lol, they don't make contact ever, and that's fine I am happy to be overlooked in that case, but don't ever underestimate our readers, mine start at 13!!! 

The saying that People can only treat you how you allow them is so very true, the ones that don't matter will see you as invisible, but you just have to sit smile and ignore them.  Give the love to the people that appreciate your age and the ones who acknowledge that you have a little depth to bring to the table.  After all, we all hit 40 at some stage.

I just want to end addressing a comment I saw, asking the question  "Are you too old to blog at 40?"  can't remember who I saw put that out there. But seriously?  STOP that silliness!  I will write for as long as my fingers allow, and my brain fog allows me to remember my log in password.

I really would appreciate comments on this, agree or disagree but lets talk.

Lyn x


No Pensioners were harmed in the writing of this post.
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4 comments

  1. Great last line, made me laugh out loud 😂, And that proves I must be over 40 as I just realised I spelt that rather than LOL!

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    1. Could be worse, you could be "Rolling on the floor pissing yourself laughing"
      Lyn x

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  2. I’ve always enjoyed hearing the opinions of people from all backgrounds of all ages. Many companies do just want to aim their products at the younger market and will send to younger pretty bloggers only. Here’s my take on it tho. I’m a model, yes, but mainly write about organic/fair trade beauty. So perhaps I’m younger and photogenic BUT my interests limit me in many ways (esp financially!). However because I have hat focus, I’m trusted by a small group of dedicated readers. Like most bloggers over 40 I’m prob never gonna reach Tanya Burr levels...but being a micro influencer has its payoff too. I’d say bloggers over 40 might have a different audience but their readers may be more discerning and want to filter out the BS (like their spending habits) so they have smaller reach but still have big sway and relevance. Xx

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    1. Thanks Rebecca, People trust you and you can sleep at night, that's what counts. I think way too many people young and old judge themselves by numbers nowadays to feel good about themselves, I have discovered recently that this attitude is not limited to the youngsters as I first thought.
      Lyn x

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